Life update, negativity and positivity

Good Morning my wonderful peeps. *Warning* This post contains much negativing before positivity.

I pray you are all well and in the best place emotionally as we deal with this horrendous outbreak, i have been wanting to write for a while but have found it very difficult, as I just don’t know where to start, healthwise I have been struggling a bit and my mental health is just not on par with my thoughts, I feel really selfish for complaining about my life when there are so many people going through so much pain in the world right now, its puts my problems into insignificance really.

I have awoken this morning after a really awful night, but I must say this is the worst nights sleep I have had in awhile, I feel more positive today although I have no idea how long this positivity will last.

So what’s been going on, as you all know I have struggled to shake off this cold I have had since christmas, it turns out I have pneumonia, and I have been struggling a lot to shake it off, I now have no contact medically until I am struggling to the point where i can not cope with my symptoms anymore, now and again I have a little panic but iv learnt to calm myself down sometimes easier than others. I know that I will be fine but the worry does creep in occasionally.

I had so much been looking forward to the day the weather got warmer and I would be able to go outside and not be in as much pain, at the moment some days my pain levels are off the scale for me, but I just have to get on with it, being told I have to stay in has been difficult, In my head I know it is for my own good as well as all those that I may come into contact with, but I do feel a little sad by it, maybe its selfish of me to say so, but when you have looked forward to something for so long its so hard when you are told you can not do it, yes my head understands why we have to stay in but my heart feels a little bit broken, one day I as well as you will be able to walk freely again, we just have to remember its a temporary setback.

Its been a bit of a bad month for health in my household im not the only one that has suffered, we were looking after 2 of my grandkids whom we thought had chicken pox, a few days later my daughter that lives at home became seriously ill, the only way to contact a medical person was by phone, my GP told me I had to stay online with 111 by this time we had been on hold for 1.5hrs!! after finally speaking to someone they as well as myself suspected Meningitis, but because of the coronavirus we had to take her to hospital ourselves and before we entered she would have to be tested for coronavirus, I tried explaining that to take her myself was not an option, we do not have a car, was told to take her by public transport!! the bus is a 1 hr 25 mins drive, by taxi 40 mins or by train a 40 min journey plus either a bus or a taxi from the train station, she was not able to move and had a temperature of 102 deg, an ambulance could not be sent as she had to be seen by a doctor 1st because of the virus, I then proceeded to tell the operator that she needs to be seen immediately and this was also agreed with by the operator but was informed it was a long way to send a doctor!!!! this then got me angry, We were told we would have to wait for a call back from a doctor as to what the next step would be, if we had a car I would not have hesitated one bit and drove her to hospital myself, but at this time we were at the mercy of others, so I now have 3 sick children at the house, all with raging temperatures, we had the windows open the heating off plying them with paracetamol and ibuprofen to try and bring down the temps, im now stressing as 20 mins had passed and still not had a phone call back from the doctor when i noticed flashing lights outside of the house, a doctor had arrived, I was go grateful that we were finally getting help, the young doctor was brilliant, was certain that it wasn’t meningitis thank god, and it wasn’t coronavirus which I already knew, she was fantastic and kept an eye on them through the night, the temperatures started to come down but different symptoms kept appearing, we had to see different medics over the next few days, we went through a virus, to chickenpox to virus to german measels to virus to an acne flare up!!! Il not go into that, the nurses attitude really angered me, but your telling me a 16 month old a 3 yr old and a 19 yr old all had an acne flare up!!! to finally a doctor saying it is some kind of virus but we have not idea and to quarantine them for 14 days, Il pop us a couple of pics of them and this is how they looked on day 3 and day 6 they were eventually covered from top to toe including in there throats no where was untouched.

Sorry I did say to myself I would rant but I think i just did.

Ok so now some Positivity, thank you for letting me have a rant, if your still with me..

We have decorated the bedroom, and done the paint work in the bathroom (awaiting the arrival of the wallpaper) as well as putting a nail through a water pipe and flooding the ceiling of the living room and filling the light fitting with water, I found a local plumber who came and sorted it for us the next morning, we could have done it our self but the hardware shop was closed and B and Q did not deliver the part we needed to fix it, we had a good laugh about it especially when i was on facetime with one of my daughters tell her about it and my almost 3 year grandson pipes up, silly grandad just leave it to the professionals, we were howling, with the things he comes out with im sure he has been here before haha.

My current project at the minute is making a dress for my youngest granddaughter for christmas, I just can decide if i should make a little jacket or a cape to go with it, and im not sure if I like the white on the dress, I will put up a pic when it is finished.

I have been doing a bit of crochet I have attached all the squares together on 2nd blanket and made the flowers but have yet to hand sew them on, Iv also been working on squares and appliques playing with different yarns and combining different patterns together, I must say my crochet has kept me sane and is brilliant when your up all night with a poorly child, Il put up a few pics of what I have been doing.

bottom right is a pink pig, its just looks like a red blob on the photo

I would like to leave you with a positive message and pray you all keep safe and well and look to the future we are in this together and we will get through it, even on our dark days there is light on the way.